Cultural Differences: Learn to be patient

Unfortunately the American culture is one of rush, rush, rush . From childhood we are anxious for everything.. and gracious for nothing. Some of us also happen to be crafty on top of impatient... it is a deadly combination when dating a foreign man (specifically African or islander). For the vast majority, life has moved a bit slower than the rapid pace of the U.S. I have been guilty of misreading certain behaviors that I only deciphered later on down the line. I do believe some of these cultural differences contributed to the strife me and my ex experienced whilst married and were also factors in our untimely divorce. Whenever I publish, I do in an effort to assist some other forward thinking woman, and never bring shame or disgrace to my former in-laws. I was not patient and neither was he, but it is so important to suspend your current way of thinking when dealing with a foreigner and examine their ways and demeanor first. To understand your man, you have to step into his world and mentality to understand how he works. It can be challenging for an American woman, but the success of your relationship depends on it.

Cultural differences: Very low expectations

Unfortunately abroad in the rest of the world American women have a terrible reputation. Especially black women due to the medias' portrayal of black women. We are shown as dramatic women with lots of illegitimate children. Seen as having attitudes and being over the top. Perceived as easy or sexually promiscuous. Sometimes foreign men will approach you with all these stereotypes inbred. They will attempt to do things with you and treat you in a way they never would with women from their own country: ask you for money, refuse to take you out, try to get sex without commitment etc. You will need to set the record straight immediately if you detect any of this behavior. If you so choose to date a foreign person, it is very important to get a grasp of their culture. It is important to meet their friends and family and observe how they behave. I can tell you most native foreigners frown on women with tattoos and that use profanity. Also if you are able, try to make friends with some ladies from their country and study them. You do not have to observe them, but I guarantee understanding him on that level will greatly benefit your relationship.

Cultural Differences: The Effect of External Influences on Your African Man

I selected an African man for specific reasons: Genes, Tradition, Community,Ambition among others just to name a few. However, I was unaware of the large influence that he would be subjected too living in the states. Some foreigners hold fast to their foreign way of life, but you will find many others are more open to experiencing American life since their migration. For me.... this became somewhat of an issue. My husband went from enjoying the occasional soccer game to watching every NBA & NFL game. He went from listening to Makossa (Cameroonian french music) to repeating the lyrics of 2chainz and Lil Wayne. He went from tailored suits to a more casual look to blend in with his peers except I didn't want all those things.... those were actually the very attributes I wanted to avoid, and I found myself extremely frustrated by his ability to be influenced in what I regarded as an negative direction. It caused us much strife in the beginning because I was very estranged from who my husband was becoming.. and he didn't understand why I was upset. I felt duped and lied too because of course I wanted an "African" man. American influence is very strong, and I now can understand that being away from home is such a big transition. Eventually my husband learned exactly why certain things were not favorable, and reverted back to the groundwork that he had learned, but he did also tell me that I had to learn patience with him. He also desired to have the same sense of belonging that any other human wishes to have. If you are dating a man that has recently come to the states, this can present a huge hurdle for you, as all of the experiences you have come to have after a lifetime of learning, your mate is just beginning that journey as an adult. My advice would be communicate with your mate. I often explained lyrics to songs and broke down the connotations of slang. My husband shared how hilarious it was to learn some of the meanings of movies and music that he had learned whilst abroad. To him, they were simply words, and African Americans that had made it and become successful were simply icons. Alot of the media that foreigners are shown abroad about the American life is misleading and alluring all at the same time. As is it our home we know the fact from fiction, but a foreigner would never be able to make that discernment until they had the opportunity to experience it for themselves.

Cultural Differences: The African King.. To Be Respected

Unlike some or the weak black men of the United States that lack confidence, an African man knows his identity.. he knows his place, and aspires to measure up to his potential. From the time he is born, he is celebrated and fussed about. He grows up in a culture that respects and caters too African men and promotes brotherhood among each other. If you are courting with an African man, you must understand this, and provide him the utmost respect. You may also invest time and research to learning about his culture as you develop your relationship. Not that you have to sacrifice your character, but it will make understanding your man much easier. In African cultures, the woman is the backbone of the family, she pulls it together, but the man is the head of the family, just as the Bible has always instructed. I have heard many people talk about how arrogant African men appear to be, however if you understand where he is coming from, you can decode him. I honestly believe that people mistake an African's confidence as arrogance. In many cases foreign men have lived very well abroad and are accustomed to a certain quality of life. This can be defined as lifestyle. 
Caring for your man shows him your appreciation. Small things such as serving his meal, complimenting him and his contributions to your family and other small thoughtful gestures stroke him to the core. He may not verbalize it, but it solidifies his manhood. Unlike American men, African men strongly embody the responsibility of their families. You will never see an African man living comfortably while his children go without or his wife is left miserable. You can always be assured that as he holds himself to a high standard, he is well aware that his family is also an extension of himself. He will pursue education tirelessly and work consistently. At his side you will see progress as he shares his blessings with you. 
African men love black women, and seek to begin families with one. They love us in a varieties of colors and appreciate our curvy figures. My husband never complains about my looks unlike some extremely critical American guys I have dated in the past that were constantly trying to mold me into something else. Exploits with women outside of their race are not always honored or recognized by their families, and unlike some American men, African men respect their family and desire to please their parents.
From my experience, African men are peaceful, quiet men.They desire to have a harmonious household and will do their part to help. I have never known one to raise their hand or be violent although it is a stereotype I am constantly confronted with. My husband holds in his emotions never ever raising his voice at me when he is frustrated. It requires me meeting him on his level. Naturally being raised here in the United States teaches a woman to be more verbal and assertive. I learned early on not to approach him like this. It got me nowhere. When you are dealing with someone special you have to learn to have respect in the way that you address them, and just like the age old saying you will always be able to get more flies with honey than with vinegar. 
If you happen to date a foreign man, remember that he is different. Learn how to communicate calmly with him, as you may have gotten a wrong impression from him, that was not meant in the context that you took it. I have found that people that were not raised here are a bit more free thinking and innocent. Although many Americans of are defensive and cautious of people, foreigners tend to see the best of situations. I have found that my husband is devoid of many emotional issues, and is very trusting of people, however with time, he has acclimated to life in America.
Hoped this provided some proper instruction on how to regard your precious African man....and insight :-)